::confessions of a dreamer::

As the stars fall from grace and light your glowing face I'm teaching myself to dream I'm holding my breath to scream I'm teaching myself to believe in the things I don't understand I don't even know if they are true..but that's what dreamers do..



Apr 21, 2005
make me scream

Superman's sitting on an airplane right next to Lois Lane


Well I saw you with your hands above your head spinning around, trying not to look down. But you did, and you fell, hard on the ground then you stumbled around for a good ten minutes and I said I'd never seen anyone look so dumb before and you laughed and said I still know how to turn you on though. You're the only one who drags me kicking and screaming through fast dreams. You're the only one who knows exactly what I mean a
nd I probably forgot to tell you this like that time I forgot to tell you about the scar. Remember how uncomfortable that made you feel? See you're not what I expected but you're the only one who knows how to handle me. And you're such a great kisser and I know that you agree.I hope you can forgive me for that time when I put my hand between your legs and said it was small cuz its really not at all. I guess there's just a part of me that likes to bring you down just to keep you around. Cuz the day you realize how amazing you are you're gonna leave me. You're the only one who holds my hair back when I'm drunk and get sick.





 


Posted at 06:04 pm by indigogirl
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Apr 15, 2005
longest line

How does it go down, when you're the biggest kid in your own playground
And how do you see me, how do I fit in your hierarchy?
Oh you tell the girls line up in single file, just gotta rearrange my denial
So I can play with you, and now I see, all the shit that isn't me
I'm too relieved to be mad, relieved and sad

Everybody needs a place to rest
Everybody wants to have a home
Don't make no difference what nobody says
Ain't nobody like to be alone
Everybody's got a hungry heart..

She had the yellow eyes of opal moons. So full of love, how could she see?He thought he'd drown in them so he set sail. Gracefully she dreamed him free. The Indian Ocean washed him on her shore flat backed on a dirt packed floor. One eye on the door. You're ten thousand miles away as the birds fly, and you want to die--Because you let her go..


Posted at 03:16 pm by indigogirl
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Apr 11, 2005
last leg of my first race

spectacular, moving, confusing,
rambunctious, contagious, outrageously perfect,
amazing and brilliant, stunning
darling, you're stunning...

you didn't look quite yourself amidst awkward stares and sprouting goosebumps. and then you said; we're forest fires waiting to happen, and buildings designed to collapse. i was never one for reality. i pray that they find you and use the softest words to hide the hardest truth.

[but my god it's so beautiful when the girl smiles]

if every day was the same, i would have died years ago.  i adore days like this...I don't know you but you cushion my akward moments.


you are my canvas.

 


Posted at 05:20 pm by indigogirl
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Apr 10, 2005
original of the species

Brown eyed girl across the street
On rue Saint Divine
I thought this is the one for me
But she was already mine
You were already his...


Some things you shouldn't get too good at
Like smiling, crying and celebrity
Some people got way too much confidence baby


I'll give you everything you want except the thing that you want-- You are the first one of your kind..

Cause I can't live if you're not happy
I can't live if you cry,
But I can live without you if it makes you smile


Posted at 12:30 pm by indigogirl
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Apr 9, 2005
leaky lungs spilling confessions.

your pale body has that graveyard charm.
those desperate looks have got me digging so deep.
i bury my head, the crown pushes please, please.
she's the maid in the masquerade.
i'm the employee asleep at the factory.


paint over the flawed perfections. a rendition. a masterpiece of hidden resentment. pounding out failures before these jaded eyes. you are the loudest silence. a roar of empty emotion. take a walk with me and let's get the demons out. red lips are split. the floodgates are gushing. drowning in a ship wreck of love. when the fondest feeling dies. it's a loose interpretation of intent gone wrong inside. pathetic, guilt-ridden motives. what do you think you can take from me? muddy hands and dirty eyes. digging up ugly treasures. expectations can kill the sweetest intentions. who would have thought it was you?




Posted at 11:42 am by indigogirl
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Apr 7, 2005
the mind of a heart

they say it fades if you let it, love was made to forget it. i carved
your name across my eyelids, you pray for rain i pray for blindness.
if you still want me, please forgive me, the crown of love is not upon me. if you still want me, please forgive me, because the spark is not within me. i snuffed it out before my mom walked in my bedroom.

the only thing that you keep changin' is your name.
the pains of love, and they keep growin', in my heart there's flowers growin' on the grave of our old love, since you gave me a straight answer. it's not within me. it's not within me. but you gotta be the one. you gotta be the way. your name is the only word, the only word that i can say...


Can a song replace a broken love?


Posted at 04:48 pm by indigogirl
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Apr 6, 2005
mystery to me

Her mind is like a very big house
We'd get lost there for hours
She's the neighbourhood queen
So are you still kissing cowboys that cry?
But she says: “No, don’t you see we have wings, It’s the funniest thing, it’s just that no ones knows.”
No one knows, sweet queen..

 


Posted at 08:07 pm by indigogirl
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Apr 4, 2005
worth 5 lines of a song.

your words they hurt my ears
they come out so clear
with the intent to hurt
these words are spinning around your face
diamonds are forever
i've got a heart made out of stone
our time is up i'm moving on carefully
no time for thoughts of someone else's dreams
diamonds they last forever
but i've got this heart made out of stone
take another look at all the things you want to be.


I'm always so wrong to you-- so why don't you just put yourself three feet above me.  I really couldn't care what the weathers like up there. And while you're at it put a rain cloud above my head and watch me make a rainbow. Send your messages through your stereo-- hate me and relate me for all the song is worth. Try and kill a girl for caring-- and watch her walk away.


Posted at 04:18 pm by indigogirl
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Apr 3, 2005
an overdramatic actor


Close the door and take the stairs.
Up or down? Ups and downs.
Don't pretend you've never been there.
You kissed me like an overdramatic actor who was starving for work,
with one last shot to make it happen.
You've won the role, you've played your part, you were cordially invited.
But I'm not impressed, and I'm definitely not excited.
'Cause the film runs a shallow budget, and the writer's subject script isn't any deeper.
So you dived right in

Hollywood hills and suburban thrills,
hey you, who are you kidding?
I'm not like them. I won't buy in.
Don't quit 'til 47.
Then we'll turn it up and we'll play a little faster.


Posted at 04:53 pm by indigogirl
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Apr 1, 2005
early summer left some wounds

Let's write something down
Let us come clean
Before I leave town
Let's write something down
I don't want it all
I just want what's mine
While I'm still around
Let's write something down
Would you care to know
That I forgot someone like you 
And it wasn't that hard to do...



When your curtain fell heaven turned to hell what was real I could never tell..

hope my smile can distract you hope my fists can fight for two so it never has to show and you’ll never know

And if yesterday night you would have cared to come I still would have felt alone though you'd been lying next to me I still would have felt alone...

I love what's left of you
And miss what now is gone
Guess the only thing I've done is moved on


October left some wounds but it took a while to see
It's way to soon to say what it's done to me
But as long as I'm ok I want to figure it out myself
Let's just hope that in a day I'll find a way
If everything's the same when I wake up tomorrow I'm giving up
If nothing here has changed when I wake up tomorrow I'm taking off
December came and I was bored as ever
By January I found love in a best friend
And it's too early to say a judgement on this most hurtful end
I hope there's time to live a while before I die and if some day I find that time I'll try to make the cold winter months seem just like warm July
I hope there's time to live before I die And as long as I'm ok I want to figure it out myself
Let's just hope that in a day I'll find my way


Posted at 04:05 pm by indigogirl
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